Browsing the blog archives for June, 2012.

“You seem so serious/sad”

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Really?!?  I thought we were doing well, quite well, actually.  Oh, to be sure, the grief and sorrow of this past year hits us at unexpected times, but. . .  I really thought we were doing more then surviving.  I’ve been happy.  We’ve been happy.  But maybe happiness tinged with sadness, just looks like sadness to the on-looker.

Maybe this year took more of a toll on us then we realize.  Maybe we’ve developed a different rating scale of how we feel.  Maybe what used to feel bad, now is happy because the sorrow was so deep.  Maybe. . .  Maybe our definitions of happiness and joy and sadness and sorrow and grief and pain and healing. . . maybe they’ve changed for us.  Maybe we’ll never view things the same again.

Maybe we feel healed more then we are because we were so injuried.  Maybe, to the onlooker, we’re walking wounded.  I’m not being naive.  I know there’s lots of healing to take place, but it feels like a lot has.  To know grief and sorrow so deep, but  then. . . to know the healing. . . to know the healing. . . to know the Healer – makes us feel like we’ve come along way.

I choose to focus on the healing that has taken place.  I don’t want to focus on how much needs to be healed.  God will continue to heal as He has this past year.  I will instead, continue to glorify Him in this healing journey.

And sometimes I fear a lifetime of this healing process.  And sometimes I delight in the fact that God will be in the healing business for our entire lifetime – until we find ourselves in His presence, fully healed.

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